Changing your life: how to gain confidence and self esteem


Thinking back on my high school years, I distinctly recall feeling awkward and not quite fitting in most of the time. That generated some self confidence and self esteem issues that were difficult to overcome. And it turns out that self confidence and self esteem are the two most important attributes to have in order to enjoy successful relationships, lucrative career opportunities, and successful athletic or musical endeavors. Since I have interest in improving all of those areas of life, it became obvious that I needed to do something to improve my mental outlook.

So I became pretty serious about learning how to gain confidence and self esteem. While it may seem difficult at first, it really ends up being just a matter of time, education, and willpower. The rewards are incredible – not only do I enjoy higher achievement, but each moment is infinitely more livable since I gave up judging myself incessantly. We really are a product of our thinking, so gaining control of your inner monologue is the most important key to changing your life.

It doesn’t happen overnight. For most of our lives, our behavior has been compared to some sort of standard, whether it’s in our job, school, or relationships. Consequently, we have a hard-wired running comparison meter that reports back to us how well we’re conforming to life’s requirements in any given moment. The only problem is that life really has no requirements (other than food, water, and sleep); the rest of it is just a collection of agreements, most of which were made for us by our parents and other authority figures.

Breaking this cycle of self condemnation doesn’t happen overnight. Self-acceptance and forgiveness for past “wrongs” is a terrific starting point. Guided imagery meditation is the best method I’ve encountered to help reduce self judgment and restore self esteem and confidence.